I’m nonplussed

Will someone please explain to me why protecting a blastocyte is so goddamn important, but once that blastocyte is born and matures into a soldier sent to Iraq, it’s okay to not give a fuck?

Because that one really confuses me.

Feel the surge!

But at least the Fetus-Americans are protected.

BAGHDAD – Five U.S. troops were killed over the weekend in Iraq, the military said Monday, pushing the death toll for April past 100 in the deadliest month for American forces this year.

[...]

The killings of the Americans came as U.S. troops have been increasingly deployed on the streets of Baghdad and housed with Iraqi troops in joint security operations away from their heavily fortified bases, raising their vulnerability to attacks.

Three American soldiers and an Iraqi interpreter were killed by a roadside bomb while on a combat patrol Sunday in eastern Baghdad, the military said. A U.S. soldier was slain Saturday by small arms fire in the same part of the city — a predominantly Shiite area where American and Iraqi forces have stepped up operations as part of the nearly 11-week-old operation to quell sectarian violence.

A Marine also was killed Sunday in Anbar province, a Sunni insurgent stronghold west of the capital, the military said.

The sad thing is that the Bush crime syndicate and those who support it and the failed “war” insist that this is a win-or-lose situation. You can’t win if you don’t have an objective to achieve, and presumably the original objective already was achieved, meaning we won.

Now, the only way to “win” is to save Americans’ lives by bringing them home. Conversely, we lose more and more with each life that is lost, and each family that grieves.

Drunky McStagger’s only real achievement has been to make the followers and heirs of James Buchanan, Andrew Johnson, and Warren Harding happy. Now none of them can be considered the worst president in history anymore.

Howard Dean is coming to Miami tomorrow

This just arrived via e-mail:

The Miami-Dade Democratic Party in conjunction w/ DFA is hosting a box lunch with DNC Chairman Howard Dean on Tuesday, May 1st, 2007 at 12:15PM at Parrot Jungle, 1111 Parrot Jungle Trail, Miami (Watson Island), FL 33132.

Cost is only $20 pp to cover cost of the event and lunch. (Parking will be at a reduced rate of $5)

Here is a unique chance to meet our National Chair, to hear to him and give him your thoughts, too!

Click here to purchase tickets (please put “Dean Event” as “employer”): Purchase Tickets

Click here for Google Map to: Parrot Jungle

My political inspiration is coming for lunch just an hour from me, and I can’t go!!! Dammit! I have a lunch meeting for work tomorrow. It would be a perfect palate-cleanser after the recent visit of Drunky McStagger.

But maybe you can go. If you do, please tell Dr. Dean I said hi.*

UPDATE (2:22 pm 4/30/07): The link to the Parrot Jungle map from the e-mail was wrong, so I fixed it. It’s now correct above. You’re welcome.

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* Just kidding — he won’t remember me, but I did meet him four times while working on his campaign in Michigan during 2003 and 2004. Somewhere I even have a picture of him shaking hands with my son.

Meanwhile, Jenna and NotJenna order another round of mojitos

Prince Harry is going to Iraq after all.

Commanders reportedly had reconsidered their decision to allow the prince to fight in Iraq for fear he would become a target of insurgents and his presence could endanger other soldiers. Harry’s regiment, the Blues and Royals, is due to begin a six-month tour of duty in Iraq within weeks.

Over the past two weeks, newspapers have reported threats by Iraqi insurgents to kill or kidnap the prince, including claims his photograph had been widely circulated among militants. Military chiefs acknowledge that Harry would be an attractive target and that his presence could lead to a surge in attacks on British forces.

Gen. Sir Richard Dannatt said the decision would be kept under review, but he hoped his statement would end media speculation on Harry’s deployment.

I hope, as I hope with all soldiers, that Harry will be safe. His decision to pursue a military career, and to engage in combat as part of the normal course of his service, just makes our chickenhawk leadership — not to mention the Cheetos-stained right-wing trolls, pundits, and bloggers who continue to prop up this unnecessary war — look even more cowardly.

And the schadenfreude just keeps on comin’

What a day for taking delight in the misfortune of others!

Locally, it’s always fun to laugh and point at the ridiculously out-of-touch residents of Palm Beach (the village, not the county — although the county has plenty of crazies, too). Whether it’s resisting the scourge of Starbucks (classic quote: “These folks hang around for hours, and you will positively love their dress code and personal grooming. Some of the body piercings are quite imaginative”) or litigating over the size of a flag, you can always count on the fabulously wealthy and impossibly short-sighted denizens of Palm Beach to put things into perspective — their perspective.

Today’s front page exposé in the Palm Beach Post reveals the most egregious residential users of water in the county, and the top ten all are multimillionaires in Palm Beach. For those of you not resident here in America’s Glans™, you may not be aware that we are battling a significant drought here, as we await the arrival of our traditional summer rains. Of course, the biggest whiners about having to reduce their water consumption are the folks in Palm Beach.

And you won’t believe the level of their consumption (.pdf) …

Click on the headline if you want to see a larger version. Yep, the leader in the clubhouse is 1.84 million gallons in a month. And number 3 on the list, Sydell Miller, is just shy of a million gallons.

In the good times, Sydell Miller’s Palm Beach estate was a paradise based on water. Lots and lots of water.

Take her 2-acre lawn of golf-course-quality grass, fronting more than 300 feet of rock-strewn ocean beach. Sprinklers sprayed it three times a day.

The 128 windows got daily washings from automated nozzles to ward off salty corrosion. The clay tennis court consumed roughly 200,000 gallons each month, hydrotherapy needed to keep its surface intact.

Toss in the koi pond, the goldfish pond, the date and coconut palms, the impatiens, the oleanders, the lime trees and the 48 water-cooled air-conditioning units, and it’s easy to see why the hair-care billionaire’s home has ranked among Palm Beach County’s gallon-consuming elite.

But lately, her estate manager says, drought has choked the flow.

The lawn is a drab pea-green, with broad patches of tan showing through like the worn fabric in a sofa cushion. Workers squeegee the windows by hand. The tennis court is getting no water at all and probably will require $12,000 of resurfacing.

“It’s heartbreaking to see what the conditions are now,” manager Charles Coxwell said while leading two visitors on a tour of La Rìverie, Miller’s 3.7-acre estate next to Rod Stewart’s. “When it’s in its glory and everything is lush and green, it’s a fantastic view.”

I’m sorry, but I really can’t work up much sympathy for people who are spending over $60,000 a year on water alone.

Of course, the problem isn’t confined to Palm Beach, but it’s Palm Beach that is doing the most whining (and therefore is most worthy of schadenfreude). Take one of the famous folks elsewhere in the county:

On the mainland, the most famous big customer might be golfer Jack Nicklaus, who consumed a comparatively thrifty 313,000 gallons a month last year at his North Palm Beach home. That was still enough to rank the Golden Bear’s No. 12 among homes served by utilities other than West Palm Beach.

Spokesman Scott Tolley said the Nicklauses are taking extensive conservation steps while experimenting with drought-tolerant grasses and operating a private nursery, which has several hundred palm trees.

Those steps include installing drip irrigation systems, which apply water to plants’ roots instead of spraying it around.

Okay, so 313,000 gallons a month isn’t chump change, but at least they’re doing something to conserve.

So, waaaah, waaaah, Sydell Miller and your pals on top of the human water consumption pyramid. While you spend more on water in a year than most people earn, please allow me to offer you a nice piping hot cup of shut the fuck up.

Waiter! A round of schadenfreude for everyone!

This already is all over the blogosphere, I know, but you know my proclivity for schadenfreude. I can’t even make this a “Daily Schadenfreude,” because it’s just too big.

ABC News’ Brian Ross revealed tonight that the list of customers of an alleged Washington-based prostitution service includes White House and Pentagon officials as well as prominent attorneys.

“There are thousands of names, tens of thousands of phone numbers,” Ross said. “And there are people there at the Pentagon, lobbyists, others at the White House, prominent lawyers — a long, long list.” Ross added that the women who worked for the service, potentially as prostitutes, “include university professors, legal secretaries, scientists, military officers.”

On Friday, Ross broke the news that U.S. Deputy Secretary of State Randall Tobias had frequented the escort service. Ross added new details to that story tonight, recounting how he asked Tobias in a telephone interview “if he knew any of the young women, their names. He said he didn’t remember them at all. He said it was like ordering pizza.”

Typical Republic asshole. Picking up women is like ordering pizza. Goddamn, what a colossal fuckstick that guy is … but again, typical Republic.

The purest form of schadenfreude, in my opinion, comes from delighting in the downfall of hypocrites. And the biggest hypocrites are family values Republics, which I’m betting will comprise 85% or more of the List.

Make yourself comfortable. It’s going to be a schadenfreude summer, kids. Pass the popcorn.

(h/t to Atrios — as though he needs one …)

The sun is rising, meaning that America’s Glans™ survived the preznit’s appearance

Drunky McStagger has come and gone, and the world hasn’t ended, so I guess that’s a good thing.

Regrettably, I had to miss the party, but it wasn’t anything we haven’t heard before … nor is the fawning press coverage anything we haven’t seen before.

For example, this morning’s Miami Herald lauds Miami Dade College’s choice of Drunky as commencement speaker as “a prudent selection.” (Unless they were referring to Drunky’s selection of MDC as a site for his speech, which would require me to give the MSM the benefit of the doubt … and they don’t deserve it.)

Typically, he spoke at a location carefully selected for its friendliness to the Bush crime syndicate, and he surrounded himself with his pals, namely Sen. Mel Martinez, Republic (and only Republic) members of the Miami-Dade congressional delegation, and of course Jeb! Bush, whom Drunky skillfully (ha!) identified as “mi hermano.”

President Bush seized on hundreds of examples of the American success story at Miami Dade College’s Kendall campus graduation on Saturday to make a push for his stalled immigration platform.

“Here at Miami Dade, you know firsthand the contributions that immigrants make to our country,” Bush told 1,500 graduates, 77 percent Hispanic, and their families at MDC’s Kendall campus gymnasium. “This experience gives you a special responsibility to make your voices heard.”

Now, note especially the pandering. Oh, and let’s not forget how the protestors were treated…

Bush and Vice President Dick Cheney have drawn more controversy as graduation speakers at other campuses this year. Protesters in Kendall were kept on the campus’ perimeter. A few professors inside the gym wore green and white ribbons to urge a withdrawal from Iraq.

Bush singled out MDC graduates Gwen Belfon, 42, a single mother of four from Trinidad and Tobago who earned an associate’s degree in education, and Jimmy Zapata, 25, a Colombia-born U.S. Marine sergeant who served in Iraq, as examples of immigrants who will contribute to America and climb the socioeconomic ladder. And he noted that MDC President Eduardo Padrón, who came from Cuba when he was 15, also began his education at MDC.

“Today, he is the first president of this college to speak English as a second language,” Bush said. “Some people might say I am the first president of the United States who can make that same claim.”

Actually, I wouldn’t make that claim. Drunky doesn’t speak English at all.

Finally, catch the conclusion of the article:

Miami Dade is the nation’s largest community college, with more than 100,000 credit and noncredit students. The Kendall campus is in the heart of South Florida’s Cuban-American community.

As he always does in Miami, Bush made sure to include language intended to appeal to that base by mentioning “the cruel dictatorship” in Cuba and promising that change on the island is near. But he offered no policy initiatives on that front.

“In Havana and other Cuban cities, there are people just like you who are attending school, and dreaming of a better life,” he said. “Unfortunately, those dreams are stifled by a cruel dictatorship that denies all freedom in the name of a dark and discredited ideology.”

Before the graduation, Bush spent part of Saturday on Key Biscayne, headlining a $25,000-a-plate fundraiser at the home of developer Edward W. Easton.

I won’t give any credit to Bush for being multicultural or openminded or anything. As always, his appearance in south Florida, like anywhere, was done for craven political reasons, and it will get him exactly nowhere, except among the most deluded 30% or so of the American populace.

And I love the unintentional irony: “Unfortunately, those dreams are stifled by a cruel dictatorship that denies all freedom in the name of a dark and discredited ideology.” It’s like Chimpy was writing a letter to Castro: “Dear Kettle, You are black. Love, Pot.”

I won’t say “thanks for coming,” George. I will, however, say thanks for leaving.

Ignorant Quote of the Week

From Thursday’s Southeast Texas Record, a legal journal based in Beaumont, Tex.:

[Beaumont attorney Brent] Coon argued that newspapers should be free of bias, like the Washington Post.

“These people try to be fair,” Coon said. “They try to tell both sides of the story.”

You mean people like, say, WaPo’s David Broder?

Never mind. There’s no point explaining.

Today’s Daily Schadenfreude: Randall Tobias

Who?

You mean the Randall Tobias (left) who was in charge of the Bush crime syndicate’s foreign aid programs?

Yep, that’s the one. Nice combover, Randy. You use spit on your comb?

Methinks he had a different definition of “foreign aid” …

Tobias submitted his resignation a day after he was interviewed by ABC News for an upcoming program about an alleged prostitution service run by the so-called D.C. Madam.

ABC reported on its Web site late Friday that Tobias confirmed that he had called the Pamela Martin and Associates escort service to have women come to his condo and give him massages. More recently, Tobias told the network, he has been using a service with Central American women.

Tobias, 65, who is married, told ABC there had been “no sex” during the women’s visits to his condo.

An aside: I always wondered what Pamela Sue Martin (right) had been doing since “The Nancy Drew Mysteries.”* But I digress …

Tobias’ actual title was Director of U.S. Foreign Assistance and U.S. Agency for International Development Administrator, in which capacity he reported to Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice. According to the article, “[h]is rank was equivalent to deputy secretary of state.”

On Wednesday, Tobias attended a luncheon at the State Department with Undersecretary of State Karen Hughes and actress Angelina Jolie, who was in Washington pushing for more U.S. education aid for developing countries.

“Psst … Angie … you doing anything after the luncheon? I’ve got some ‘foreign aid’ you can give, if you know what I mean …”

It’s so refreshing to see bad things happen to bad people. And as far as I’m concerned, anyone who aligns him- or herself with the Bush crime syndicate is a bad person. So, congratulations to Randall Tobias — today’s Blast Off! Daily Schadenfreude is for you!

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* I keed, I keed … Ms. Martin is a lovely woman, on whom I’ve had a crush since 1974. I would never cast aspersions on her character. Cross my heart. Now bring that flashlight and come sit by me, Pam …

Another battle in the blogwars

I began blogging back in 2004, thanks to Wes, and I became very active both at Daily Kos and at Atrios’ Eschaton. At dKos, I had a very low “uid,” or user ID, number (1142), which presumably was a badge of status and honor, as one of the earliest participants there. (The uid’s are well over 100,000 now.)

Over time, though, I noticed dKos getting more and more shrill and exclusionary, and I always felt more comfortable in the chatroom-like environs of Eschaton. The Kossacks didn’t just attack right-wing trolls, but essentially they ostracized anyone who even dared to criticize Democrats, as I did when I took issue with Nancy Pelosi’s decision to take impeachment off the table in January.

Today, MissLaura posted an open thread at dKos that, among other things, essentially said that the time-honored Atriot tradition of saying “First!” or “Frist!” or, now, “Pelosi” at the start of a new comment thread would not be tolerated at dKos. Well, that’s fine — have it your way. That’s not the way I prefer to blog.

So I guess my comment at dKos today is kind of my valedictory, my farewell to a blog that was a great introduction to the blogosphere for me, but which I believe I have left behind. I don’t see this as an arrogant attitude, but simply one that recognizes that I prefer to spend my blogging time laughing with online friends, railing at the abuses of power on both sides of the figurative aisle, and feeling free to express what might be less-than-popular viewpoints. In other words, I value my open mind, and I intend to keep it that way.

Thanks, Markos, for the good times.